Saturday, November 22, 2008

SFL Saturday -- Bench and Bar Edition


Anyways so I roll up to the Diplomat Hotel yesterday morning looking, as 'trane noted, resplendent in my Van Dyke and feeling good about our profession after the tremendous showing of support for Ben on Thursday.

As I entered the Convention Area I spied a fit, older gentleman ordering a double at the hotel bar. It was none other than Judge Fay! "Come on over, SFL, I hate to drink alone!"

"Why yes, Your Honor, but isn't it a little early to be having a drink?"

"Son, you ever see The Verdict?"

"I have, Your Honor, one of my favorite films."

"Mine too. Sidney Lumet was the best. It's about corruption, how greed and avarice at the highest levels distort our ideals, bury us beneath our highest aspirations, and force us to slowly submit, to be comfortable with our small failures, to deceive ourselves day by day until there's nothing left of our souls."

"Um, yeah."

"The point is, son, to fight back. Rail against the injustices, don't be a patsy, expose the forces of corruption and fight for what's right dammit!"

With that the Judge cracked two raw eggs into his glass of whiskey, downed it immediately, and ordered another. "Now that's what I call breakfast."

So me and the Judge spent the next few hours compiling a list of our outrages, things that really bothered us. Why the hail DID Senator Clinton spend 11 days in Las Vegas giving one speech to a union? Why don't these Congresspeople work more? How comes federal judges keep getting their cost of living raises denied? What is it with these "fat cat" union bosses that won't allow secret ballots and that are tanking the auto industry? Did I mention the damn unions?

How about lobbyists -- I hate those jerks.

And so it went. Well, before you know it, it was nearly lunchtime.

"Darn it SFL, why didn't you remind me! I gotta give a speech for chrissakes! Hand me that pad, I'm going to tell everybody exactly what's on our minds! No holding back this time, SFL!"

"Judge, are you sure..." But before I could finish my sentence, the judge had jumped off his stool, grabbed the notepad and was gone.

I don't want to take all the credit, but that was one hail of a speech.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hilarious! Was his speech really like that?

Anonymous said...

It wasn't that judicious. Sounded more like Newt Gingrich drinking with Rush Limbaugh, complaining about the unfairness of anything not Republican.

Anonymous said...

SFL is being kind. Way way worse.

Anonymous said...

Fay embarrassed himself. No one will ever again think he is fair and balanced.

fake Chris Carver said...

Even I'm not that angry.

Anonymous said...

Fay is and always has been a poser.

Pearls-for-the-Princess said...

11:20, Good one.

styx-ranters-for-the-princess said...

I'm sorry I missed it. Great report SFL.

Anonymous said...

5:58, ditto. I was there, SFL nailed it. An unreal speech.

Rogger Mcloud said...

Dude, we are talking about Jean Claude Van Dike? The one from the action movies. Wow, he is my favorite. While I was in Buenos Aires I have seen all his movies, the man is a real genius. I have a friend who has some furnished apartments buenos aires and he is also the owner of the fans club of Jean Claude in Argentina.