Wednesday, September 1, 2010

3d DCA Watch -- Lis Pendens Poetry Slam!



Dear 3d DCA:

You let me down, bro.  I was really starting to think we had something, you know, our Wednesday thang, but then you go and pull a disappearing act and it just ain't cool.

What am I supposed to think?

How am I supposed to feel?

Sure you offered me a small lis pendens opinion, one any two-bit appellate clerk could draft, and you expect me to be satisfied?  That I'm going to be ok with that?

Go back to your temperature-controlled bunker, we're through!

Here's what I think of your lis pendens, take it away Mike Allen:

lis pendens

I filed suit for your soul today.
You felt the service in your bones.
If by tonight you don't respond,
Your spirit will become my own.

Who will stop the judgment nigh
And represent you in your plight?
The counsel who will face this court
Cannot be hired in noonday light;

So summoned, come, quaking pro se
And foolishly fight this complaint.
The jury picked to hear your plea
Will not be stricken of my taint.

No verdict cap or tort reform
Will curb the cost this judge demands
Once you've demurred and left your fate
Unbalanced in his scaly hands.
 I sued you for your soul this eve
And placed a lien upon your bones;
No matter how just your appeal,
Your spirit will become my own. 
 Ok, that was little much.

Maybe I overreacted.

Let's just forget about the whole thing.  We both said some things.....

Can't we coffee-swill like old times?

(Your robes look especially resplendent today!)

Uhh.....see you next Wednesday?

4 comments:

  1. They're not issuing any more opinions. They are only issuing PCA's, except to reverse big PI verdicts.

    ReplyDelete
  2. beautiful, bemused, bellicose butcher.

    ReplyDelete