Friday, June 15, 2012

Mormon Up Your Sexy Time





Religious Tolerance

What does someone who goes by the handle “Godwhacker” know about religious tolerance? Everything. I tolerate all y'all's screwy religions. Oh I love Judaism, bagels and lox YUM! But it loses me at circumcision. Come on folks, that's there for a reason! Crucifictions, stonings, virgin births, I whack it all back at 'em.

But it has recently come to my attention that some people are unwilling to vote for Mitt Romney because of his Mormon beliefs. As a gay American, I am shocked to find this type of senseless bigotry flourishing in our country this far into the 21st century where we are a more tolerant and enlightened people. Right.

Our traditions forbid religious tests for holding office, and we should not impose them ourselves. Please, be good Americans! Don't vote against Romney because of his Mormon beliefs. So what if the Mormon Church considered all black people damned until 1978? Who cares if they Baptize the dead into their religion? We say “heaven” they say “Kolob” ~ it's really no big deal. We wear boxers, they wear magic underoos. Which candidate would you rather have a beer glass of milk with? It's not like we're from different planets.

If you're going to vote against Mitt Romney, do it for the right reasons. The fact that he has held every possible position on every possible issue seems like a good one to me. Vote against him because the austerity he advocates is doing so very very well for Europe. Besides, I'm sure there are plenty of legitimate reasons to have Cayman Island bank accounts that don't involve tax avoidance. I don't know, I wasn't there.



In the meantime, if you're like Me and aggressively anticipating the joys of a Romney presidency, you'll want to Mormon up your sexy time with a few of these FABULOUS blessed knickers. They go great with leather, and from what I hear the hot wax can't hurt you. Win win!

*The views expressed in this post are solely those of the author.

6 comments:

  1. Cool banner but you covered up the flamingo!!

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  2. All will be back to normal, eventually....

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  3. Self deportation, not self stimulation!

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  4. Terrific guest post, Godfucker! That underwear website is very funny.

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  5. I can see you guys have taken the concept of guest blogging to its absolute limit.

    Nice job fellas!

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  6. All will be back to normal, eventually....

    ReplyDelete