Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Car Talk With Magistrate Judge Goodman!

Now that Click and Clack are retiring after 25 years of dispensing home-spun car repair advice on NPR, who will step up to fill the void?

I know a certain Magistrate Judge who may be interested.

Consider this extended vehicle analogy (plus bonus musical reference!) where lawyers are compared to cars in a case where the Judge is awarding fees in a routine FLSA matter:
This analogy can be extended further in this case because two partner-level attorneys were used. To that end, the Court’s point here is that only one Ford Fusion was required to drive Plaintiff across the finish line of a trial to a jury verdict, and any other lawyer-driven vehicles would need to be compensated under a more-reasonable approach. Thus, Mr. Georges-Pierre may well also be a Fusion-type driver who controls his client’s trial vehicle in FLSA cases, but the statutory reimbursement standards will treat him as though he was driving a pre-owned Toyota or a motorcycle (or any other kind of transportation option less expensive than a Fusion but still more than adequate to transport this case to a verdict in Plaintiff’s favor).

Of course, there may well be cases where the client is, in fact, entitled to be reimbursed for two Ford Fusion-type attorneys or a single BMW-type. There may even be some rare, esoteric and complex cases, such as antitrust cases and sophisticated, science-laden patent infringement cases, where the prevailing party is entitled to be reimbursed for a Ferrari. But this is certainly not one of those cases. Screen did not need to select two solid, reliable Ford cars in a routine FLSA case where the compensatory damages were less than $10,000. He could have traveled along the litigation highway in a base model Ford Fusion1 (without the luxury package), followed in tandem by a used (albeit “certified”) Toyota Corolla. To invoke a musical reference, the fees motion is somewhat analogous to the plight articulated by iconic blues singer B.B. King in “How Blue Can You Get,” a/k/a “Downhearted,” from his 1962 album Blues in My Heart: ”I gave you a brand new Ford and you said ‘I want a Cadillac.’”2

Without commenting on whether any of the lawyers in the case are worthy of Ferrari, Cadillac, Ford or Toyota rates, the hourly fee rates paid by a client are not necessarily the same as the ones used by a court awarding statutory, “reasonable” fees and the trial staffing decisions are also not going to be automatically adopted by a court.
Ok, maybe it's just me but I got the analogy after the first sentence.....

I also like footnote one:
1 Henry Ford’s motto was “simplicity.” http://gardenofpraise.com/scramford.htm (last visited July 20, 2012). In the early years, this simplification resulted in only one color choice. He famously wrote: “People can have the Model T in any color – so long as it’s black.” http://quotes4all.net/henry%20ford:3.html (last visited July 20, 2012). Had Screen followed Mr. Ford’s business philosophy, he would have used a partner and an associate, not two partners, for the trial.
Actually, had Screen followed Mr. Ford's business philosophy, he would have used a partner and an associate, not two partners, for the trial -- provided none were more than 1/8 Jew.


Anonymous said...

What is it with mags and car analogies?

Anonymous said...

He is being a jackass. You have a case that goes beyond summary judgment because facts are in dispute - typically that means that the skill of the lawyer can change the outcome.

This fucker seems to think that any "everyman" attorney can obtain the same result and the attorney or amount do not matter. Of course, that is asinine.

Glad to finally find out that the quality of lawyers do not matter.

Anonymous said...

just plain silly.

Anonymous said...

he gets paid by the word.

Anonymous said...

Good to know that a Yugo can write mag opinions too - no need for an Article III Buick to get involved.

Anonymous said...

Goodman is getting too cute with his orders. Dropping BB King analogies and movie references into federal court orders demeans the whole process--save that for law review articles.

Lay out the facts and the law and explain why they justify the ruling. A guy like Judge Jordan would never pull this stuff and yet his orders were excellent.

Also, have some respect for the lawyers and their clients. Who wants to go back to their non-prevailing client and show them an order with these references?

Anonymous said...

Goodman sucked as a lawyer, Akerman was a joke of a criminal law practice.Now he has moved his skit to the next city...so long fuck head!

Anonymous said...

Still better than Torres.

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