Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Shoes to Die For

I hate it when parties go like this...
The story began with cocaine and Christmas shoes, and veered into beating and torture.

 LARGO — A Pinellas County jury listened Tuesday to the vivid and horrifying story of how Stacia Berman's body was found — wrapped in a blanket, plastic bags covering her head, floating in St. Petersburg's Lake Maggiore with two alligators swimming nearby.
The story began with cocaine and Christmas shoes, and veered into beating and torture. Assistant State Attorney Fred Schaub told jurors they should conclude the tale by convicting Santonio "Red" Smith and Letrell "Trell" McKnight.
It's Florida so you know alligators had to come in somewhere. More here.

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

FREE THE SHUMDOG!!!

I time travel for fun said...

There's a wormhole behind a vending machine in a local courthouse. When you enter it you get transported back to December 16, 1978. Very weird. When you come out of the hole you are in a vacant lot in Hialeah. Try getting a cab then- ridiculous. Plus you can't use any of regular 2011 money. To them it looks like funny money. Very hard to navigate back then. No cell phones, computer, internet. But The chicks are hot and no AIDS yet so you can score easier.

Anonymous said...

Typical- Guy makes the find of the century and he cares about what? Video games, internet, money and sex.

Godwhacker said...

In Star Trek lore, Zefram Cochrane built the warp engine that enabled deep space travel to "retire to some tropical island filled with ...naked women."

With life this primitive, we have to take progress where we can find it.

Anonymous said...

Are you crazy?? Did you see the end of Ghostbusters where that idiot from the EPA orders the guy from Con Ed to shut down the containment system and basically the whole city of NY almost is destroyed? That's what releasing the ShumDog would do with out proper preparations.

BTW Love the time travel guy.

Anonymous said...

I like the 70s. The drugs were much better. None of this crazy shit.

Anonymous said...

Roger that about releasing the ShumDog. Unless you want a world of hurt on yourself. That ShumDog is trouble with a capital T.

I time travel for fun said...

You all think this is funny. But there are real problems you haven't thought about:

1) Driver's License. Can't use my current one for obvious reasons, can't get one in 1978 because I'm 14. And I have no address.

2) It almost impossible to make money, I can't take anything written with me- it blanks out when I arrive, so sure I can memorize the trifecta in the first at Hialeah race track, but I have to get there, and somehow the universe senses that if I am going to profit from the travel it stops me. I can take a cab to a restaurant no problem. But every cab I take to the race track gets a flat or a fender bender on the way.

3) The time I spend in 1978 is not equal to the time here and there is no telling what it will be. Once I went for two hours and when I came back I had lost two days and my phone was full of messages and clients were furious for missed court dates. Another time I went for two days and when I came back it was the day before I left and I had to re-live that whole day over, including the inexorable push to enter the wormhole when I had before. I literally had a force pushing me. So eventually I hopped in and quickly hopped back- dreading that it would be the day before again and I would be trapped in an endless time loop. But it wasn't. It was an hour later. Whew.

4) I can't set stuff up in 1978 because I return there at the same time. So even if I spent a month and rented an apartment, if I left and returned that whole month was wiped out and I am at the beginning.


5) I know this sounds frivolous but the TV sucks. Barely any cable. So if you stay over night and are alone you are stuck with 1978 entertainment, which is sucky tv and any book from that era.

Anyway, its not as fun as you might think.

Anonymous said...

I'm pretty sure I don't believe it, but it's fascinating.

Anonymous said...

OK smart guy, name three differences back then that we take for granted today, and don't tell me cell phones, internet, debit cards. Make it something real that only someone from then would know/remember.

I time travel for fun said...

I don't really want to be quizzed, but I'll take your challenge:

1) Lots of people smoke everywhere. Cabs, banks, supermarkets, movie theaters, on the bus, in restaurants. Its very annoying.

2) The cars look like they come from the 1960's. Clunky, big and weird looking, at least to my eyes.

3) Hialeah is still very much a redneck town. I hear the N word A LOT and lots of people complaining about "spics" as well.

I'll keep going because I have lots of info.

4) Lots of guys wear their hair shoulder length and with big porno-movie star mustaches. Girls wear short dresses and mini skirts - not a whole lot- but more than you see today. Also bit of the 60's in flower type patterns on dresses. Also there is a fad of "Pat Benatar" short hair cuts (bobs?) and plain colored silk blouses. Also Big sunglasses are in. Weird.

5) disco music is everywhere. Discos are popping up on street corners. Weird. South Beach is just old people and drug stores and old supermarkets.

6) Lots of banks I never heard of.

7) The food sucks. Breakfast is the same, but lots of crappy restaurants and old chains- Remember Sambos restaurant? A racists place, but people go there! No awareness of nutrition or organic foods.

8) Lots of talk radio. The sports shows only talk about the Dolphins. All the time.

9) Mariel hasn't begun yet, but I speak spanish and in the coffee shops there is lots of chatter about unrest in Cuba. Lots of people think its only a matter of time before Castro is gone. Sigh- if they only knew.

OK- believe me or not, but this is the strangest thing you could ever imagine and the problem for me is that it wrecks havoc on my 2011 life because I can never predict how long I will be gone, I am scared to death because I almost got caught in a endless time loop; I cannot figure out a way to profit from this; there is a strange force in the universe- not saying a religious thing, but something strange that keeps me from upsetting the past in any meaningful manner. its like I am in a china store- I can look but not touch. Except I have gotten lucky a few times. And I have touched, but I have used condoms because I do not EVEN want to contemplate to running into my child in 2011 all grown up. So I stay safe. But its a major weird experience and I can only talk about it anonymously. Because otherwise I would be baker acted.

Anonymous said...

Stop it. You're freaking me out.

South Florida Lawyers said...

Time traveler is ready for his own blog post.

Godwhacker said...

I can neither conclusively refute nor confirm any of this.

Rumpole said...

When are you going back?

South Florida Lawyers said...

End of June, Rump -- it feels great to take some time off...

Rumpole said...

I meant the time traveler. But good to know.

Godwhacker said...

It's all about him Rummy! Or so he thinks!

Anonymous said...

Sambos. I remember that place. Grandma used to take me to one on Miami Beach about 30th and Collins.
Had the whole story of the little boy Sambo painted on murals around the restaurant.
Never had any idea people considered it racist. The Sambo's name came from the name of it's owners.
I was sad when they turned it into a Dennys and painted over the tigers and monkeys.

Godwhacker said...

@10:21

I was there and I remember. It was my grandmother who took me too.

Anonymous said...

GW,

Did your Grandma also have a weekly cleaning 'girl'?

Talk about racist.

I laugh every time I remember when I found out that the 'girl' was a black woman about 10 years older than my grandmother.

Anonymous said...

10:00 needs to work on reading comprehension.

Godwhacker said...

@10:00
I think you misunderstand the time period. There were many things that were normal in the 60s that we'd consider racist now. We didn't then. That was our ignorance, but we evolved like many are doing on gay rights now.

For the record my grandmother didn't have a maid, although she worked as one from time to time. And when you've had as many black lovers as I have you can't really accuse me of racism.

Got it?

Anonymous said...

10:00 here, checking in a few days late.
Sorry, i guess i wasn't clear on my post. I certainly didn't mean to accuse you of being racist. It was my own grandmother who had a cleaning 'girl' (old black woman.)
And I know grandma didn't think it was racist. All her friends had 'the girl' come once a week to clean.
It was perfectly normal to them.
good thing none of them had a cooking show.
I'm glad times they are a changin