Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Spencer Aronfeld Hates Bedsores!

 
Insert clever comment by SFL here.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

This blog has become a parody of itself.

Anonymous said...

With all due respect to Spencer, Time Traveler has become the most interesting person on this blog.

Godwhacker said...

We are all the time traveler. If matter is finite but time infinite eventually all possible combinations of matter will occur and then repeat.

Spencer's World said...

Not true. There will never be another Spencer. He is sui generis.

Spencer's 4th law of thermodynamics: "Matter can neither be created nor destroyed, but in handling matter did you know that unless the individual is trained and certified there is a significant risk that you and your family court be injured through the negligence of a matter handler? If you have been injured, the lawyers at the Aronfeld law firm offer a free analysis of your matter injury. You Hurt. We recover."


Anonymous said...

Frickin Brillant. and hysterical.

Anonymous said...

What a laughable man. I wonder when he will figure that out?

Anonymous said...

Spencer was on Channel 4 yesterday. Had one of the shuckers claimants that fell in water and was hurt.

Anonymous said...

Oswald WAS a patsy. And Now I have the proof!

Anonymous said...

I always suspected that.

Anonymous said...

Operation Paperclip, the Gehlen Organization is folded into the OSS to create the CIA and along with the NAZI spies we get a big dose of Nazi ideology. JFK tried to stop them and lost. Now I've said too much...

Anonymous said...

I like the shirt and tie, but the suit is not age-appropriate.

Anonymous said...

the ad would be so much better in spanish.

Spencer's World said...

As the camera fades in we see a young child peddling a tricycle furiously. As the camera pulls back, a set of parents are watching, and then the camera pulls back further and we see an older couple- the woman in a wheelchair, the man, with gray hair and a gray mustache, holding on to a walker. The inescapable message: we all get older.

The gentle music fades and the camera pans to the side an in walks Spencer.
"We all get old. But did you know that getting old is the leading cause of death? Heart attacks, strokes, cancer, dementia are all seen with increasing frequency as you age. A senile man totters off the grand canyon and plummets to his death; and elderly woman reading her newspaper on her morning stroll wanders into traffic and is flattened by a bus; a grandfather twitches and quivers a few times before a massive stoke ends his retirement. The link to his video has a blog post listing a 1001 ways you can die as you get old: from choking on your pills, to bashing your head in the shower when you slip. So please, be careful as you age, and if you or a loved one is inured, call me: Spencer Aronfeld- the lawyer who sues for getting old."

The camera pans back as the tot on the tricycle loses control and smashes into the old man, who falls into the woman in the wheel chair and all three end up on the ground in a bloody mess as the phone number and website for Spencer are superimposed over the scene of carnage.

Spencer's World said...

As the camera fades in we see a young child peddling a tricycle furiously. As the camera pulls back, a set of parents are watching, and then the camera pulls back further and we see an older couple- the woman in a wheelchair, the man, with gray hair and a gray mustache, holding on to a walker. The inescapable message: we all get older.

The gentle music fades and the camera pans to the side an in walks Spencer.
"We all get old. But did you know that getting old is the leading cause of death? Heart attacks, strokes, cancer, dementia are all seen with increasing frequency as you age. A senile man totters off the grand canyon and plummets to his death; and elderly woman reading her newspaper on her morning stroll wanders into traffic and is flattened by a bus; a grandfather twitches and quivers a few times before a massive stoke ends his retirement. The link to this video has a blog post listing a 1001 ways you can die as you get old: from choking on your pills, to bashing your head in the shower when you slip. So please, be careful as you age, and if you or a loved one is inured, call me: Spencer Aronfeld- the lawyer who sues for getting old."

The camera pans back as the tot on the tricycle loses control and smashes into the old man, who falls into the woman in the wheel chair and all three end up on the ground in a bloody mess as the phone number and website for Spencer are superimposed over the scene of carnage.