Enjoy Your Summer Cruise From Hell! (Happy Monday).

Spence is back from Europe -- shaved, (relatively) booze-free, wearing his crisp suit and red power tie (with matching red hanky), and he's ready to strike fear provide cautionary advice to our many South Florida cruise passengers.

Happy cruising!


  1. Let's see, red hanky worn on the left means...

  2. Did I mention that my link is NSFW? Do I even have to?

  3. Harold: Good news Gladys, I booked that cruise on Celebrity. We're going to be cruising with Frank and Kathy Lee.

    Gladys; A cruise! That leaves from Miami? They don't speak no good english there like here in Gary, Indiana.

    Harold: But they have 11 buffets a day. Eric "the eater" Anderson set the record last year and gained 43 pounds in one week, but he did buy the ice cream buffet upgrade. I think we should do that too. It's only an extra $49.00 per person.

    Gladys: I was on you tube and saw this lawyer Spencer something. He said cruising was dangerous.

    Harold. His name is Aronfeld. He's one of those…if you get what I mean. Doesn't go to church. Won't eat bacon or tuna fish on Thursdays.

    Gladys. But he says a common effect of cruising is falling overboard and drowning or falling down and hitting your head and getting a stoke or food poisoning or get attacked by a crazed cruise member who is from ISIS and wants to kill Americans. Plus if you get hurt, which you probably will if you don't die, you have to sue in Miami and speak Spanish and they use the sharia law down there with all dem cubans and mexicans and foreigners.

    Harold. Maybe you're right, we'll just go to Dollyland again. They have that good chinese buffet.


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